Keeping a soft heart

These days, it will become easier for people to harden their hearts just to survive.  But as Christians, we are called to keep a soft heart.

When it comes to hardening our hearts, here is a typical cycle of how it usually happens: 

Self-protect

        Hard heart

                Love grows cold

When we build a hard protective layer around ourselves, our hearts, to self-protect (no one likes to be hurt), it may feel like we've "won."  But therein lies the deception.

That self-protection leads to a hard heart.  And everything issues from the heart.  Our relationship with God, first and foremost.  But after that, our relationships with everyone else, including ourselves.

And a hard heart can only to lead to less love.  Jesus warns of this in Matthew 24 - that the love of many will grow cold.  He even says how it will happen.  The increasing lawlessness around us, and just the disintigration of a healthy society, these will lead to less love if we're not careful.

But Jesus didn't say that would happen to all of us!  Many is many, but not all.

So the trick is to be among the few who still love well.  And tricky it is!  When so many have become self-preoccupied, we will stick out like sore thumbs.  We may even appear naive or maudlin.  

But deep down people know that those who continue to selflessly love win.

Love is where it's at.

And in order to continue loving others, we will need to keep a soft heart.  And in order to keep a soft heart, we will need to be vulnerable - not just transparet (everyone is telling their "story" these days!), but vulnerable.  Being vulnerable means that we do not self-protect.  We leave ourselves open to pot shots, hatred, and whatever else others may throw at us!

But the upshot is that keeping our hearts soft also allows us to return love for their hate; to keep God's love abiding in us.

How is it that Jesus could hang on a cross in excruciating agony and still say, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."?  Unimaginable!  

But look at the root of these words.  Ignorance.  The people were clueless.  They had no idea that they were crucifying God Himself.

And most people act out of ignorance when they hurl insults at us - they are clueless as to what we are really about when we give our lives to Christ.  They are clueless as to why we would stay loving - not just overall but toward them! - when we have been so mistreated.

Because the love inside of us has nothing to do with how we are treated by others.

This has taken me decades to learn!  Decades!

In other words, if you come at me with your awful ways, I need not respond in like.  I return love for hate because the love of Christ has been shed abroad in my heart - the only real love out there. (see Romans 5:5)

People mistake this for becoming a doormat or punching bag for others; they mistake it for weakness.

Yes, if you turn your cheek, people will most likely slap the other one, too!  But this is not weakness but the power of love.  

I am not condoning abuse here, so don't go there!

What I am saying is that real love looks so different than the sort we've been fed by Hollywood, or even by our own families and friends.  

And we can't pick and choose!  Rats!  :)  

We cannot pick and choose to whom we will be loving.  Again, this is because it is an inner job and has nothing to do with how others treat us or act in ways we don't like.  Liking someone has very little to do with loving them.  We can, and are called to, love those we don't like!

We either keep our hearts soft or we don't.  We either harden our hearts and allow our love to grow cold or we don't.

The choice is ours.

We cannot blame others for our ability to love or if we become hard-hearted.  It is within ourselves to choose the way we will be and behave.

Takeaway?  Do it anyway!  Though it hurts and costs us, love anyway!  Though a soft heart is open to ridicule, keep it soft anyway!  

These are not words of warm and fuzzy advice.  These are very real things that we will need in the days ahead in order to stay close to God - the Source of the love inside of us.

People are hungry for God.  People need God.  People need love.  And if Christians don't give it to them, where else are they going to find it?

Oh there are still plenty of loving people out there who do not follow Christ.  But can they keep loving even when they've been wronged or hurt?  Can they forgive?  Can they love those with whom they disagree? These are the hallmarks of Christ's love in us, so we must let them out!

“Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts as they did when they provoked Me.” Hebrews 3:!5

Oh Lord, how we need Your love to remain strong in our hearts!  But that means that we need to keep our hearts soft, no matter how many times they get hurt!  Thank You for Your rich, unending, and deep love for us.  We cannot truly love others without Your love inside of us - especially in this world nowadays! Oh it's easy to love those who love us.  But Your kind of love empowers us to love even our enemies, even those with whom we disagree.  Even when You called the Pharisees a brood of vipers, You were speaking truth in love!  You hated their hypocrisy and showed it up for what it was.  But You never once spoke from a hard heart.  So please help us keep our hearts soft like Yours, Lord Jesus, so that we may truly love well and keep close to You.  In Jesus' Name.  Amen.