Not picture perfect

For those of us who have seen only the "good" side of others' families on social media, take heart.  It has left its unholy mark on us because the whole picture is not fully revealed.  We are only shown the family photo op, not the whole truth.  The whole truth may not be so pretty.

For those struggling with family relationships, here are some good words for you that came up when I Googled "When family fails."  (see below)

When people are damaged emotionally, dysfunction reigns.  There are deep-rooted lies that may never be fully healed this side of heaven.  How to live with that pain?  Pray.  Give it to God.  Trust Him to make it as He wills, whether or not it is the way we want. 

But remember that people have wills of their own!  And if they are not living the good life - the obedient to Christ life - messes will remain.  

This is not to discourage you, but to encourage you to seek your Heavenly Father.  For He is glorified in broken people; in those of us who may be cast aside, neglected, or mistreated by those who are meant to love us most.  The Bible is full of such people.  Old Testament Joseph, for one.  Jesus Himself left His family and only His mother and His disciple John were with Him in the end.  

Jesus spoke about family very clearly.  And it resembles very little the social media pix we see.  Jesus tells us to leave family for His Kingdom.  Jesus said that His family were those who did God's will (not His biological family).  

So here you go.  I pray these words help truth sink deep into your heart to replace the lies that you may have swallowed via social media posts:

The Christian view when a family fails focuses on finding ultimate security, healing, and identity in God as the perfect Father, rather than relying solely on earthly family structures. While recognizing the deep pain of dysfunction, faith offers hope that God can redeem brokenness, use these trials to cultivate spiritual growth, and provide a new, eternal family through the church [note: church family will fail, too.  All of it is meant to push us closer to God].

Key aspects of the Christian perspective on family failure include:

• God as the Ultimate Parent: When earthly families fail, God offers unconditional love, comfort, and, as a Father, holds the future.
• Hope for Redemption: Biblical narratives show that God works through broken, dysfunctional, and imperfect families, often making "something beautiful" out of the mess.
• Focus on Grace and Forgiveness: The response to family failure is not despair, but rather extending grace, forgiving freely, and seeking reconciliation when possible.
• The Role of the Church: The church is called to stand in the gap, offering support, safety, and a community for those whose families have broken down.
• Individual Identity in Christ: A person's value is not determined by their family's failures; children of dysfunctional parents can still thrive, as their identity is rooted in Christ.
• Setting Boundaries: While forgiveness is central, establishing healthy boundaries is often necessary for emotional and physical safety. 
  
  

Instead of pursuing a "prosperity gospel" for families (believing perfect obedience guarantees a perfect home), Christians are encouraged to accept that even in brokenness, God's purpose can be accomplished. 

I truly hope this helps you, dear readers.  There is hope!  And when we place our hope fully in Christ, His power, His Presence, His purposes for our lives (which may or may not include full family healing this side of heaven), we are free.  We are free to see things as they are and still live in love, peace, joy, and abiding hope.  We are free to shift our focus back where it belongs:  on the One who loves us perfectly.

One day, He will make all things new and truly perfect (whole and complete).  He promises.  That's how I know.